Numb

So, I’m not sure what inspired this post. Well, I know exactly what did. It’s been a hormonal few days.

A comedian I really admire, has recently been posting on her Facebook about her Mother sadly falling ill with Cancer. A wicked, cold hearted snake that affects a lot of people. It is truly life changing and something my family have to deal with on a weekly basis, but I am extremely lucky that my Mummy is the bravest, strongest woman in the world. She is a powerhouse and is quite seriously my entire world.

I want this post to explain something that happens to a lot of people. Something that floors me and turns even the smallest of emotion dips into the mother of all anxiety attacks.

Numb.

That feeling that some of you have definitely experienced before it cripples you and you feel every negative emotion under the sun and then all of a sudden you lose that. You feel nothing, and all you can do is, nothing. You’re asked an opinion and then all you can do is say ‘i don’t care’ and it’s not at all that you don’t care it’s that you honestly can’t feel enough to make a decision.

There’s a gaping hole through the middle of you.

Some people will call it anxiety but for me they are two very different things. My anxiety makes me a shaking nervous wreck and unfortunately in my current life, it is only getting worse and more intense.

So, I want to explain to you guys that, that numb horrible feeling that you sometimes get, is normal. I mean, lets be serious here, nothing is ‘normal’ but it’s not ‘abnormal’. You are not alone.

A lot of people get ‘numb’ and I feel if more people speak out we can ‘normalize’ mental health issues and really get down to the nitty gritty of what triggers attacks so we can control them. By control, I mean learn our own bodies and ride along with it. I don’t believe we should fill our bodies full of chemicals to conquer mental illness, I by no means saying you shouldn’t if it works for you, but I don’t think that’s the solution.

Here’s just a few things I’ve learnt from my experience with Anxiety and feeling Numb;

Support is what we need. I believe people really underestimate the power of emotional support. From Friends, from Family, from a complete stranger. Sometimes someone telling you your emotions are valid and things will get better is all you need.

Cry. Don’t be afraid to cry. It IS NOT weakness. It is relieving your body of negative energy.

Learn to laugh. Learn to make light of situations. I am consciously trying to smile and laugh more. I feel like I constantly have a dark cloud looming above me.

Breathe. Deep breaths can save you from that heart wrenching, racing feeling. Breathing can be everything.


This has probably been as messy as my head is right now. But, I hope it’s helped at least 1 person out there.

Also, what do you think of me using my own face?! Conceited?

Keep yourselves safe, kids.

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